Photos taken and poem written in November 2018. Denver, CO.
Thumping to a count of 10
My heart pitters then jumps
It’s often overwhelming
When I look outside in Denver.
The crisp of the air, not killing me,
But chilling me. Strengthening
My ability to handle the changes.
For if I’m braced for winter, I can
Handle any weather.
If you don’t like what’s happening
Wait. It will change. It has to. I
Used to relish this knowledge:
Knowing if I didn’t like where I was
I would never stay there.
What about now when I don’t want
To go anywhere? When the changes are
Rapid but I don’t want to go on tonight’s
Plane? What if I wanted to slow down
The pace of the day, so I could
Spend more moments in pure
Gratitude?
Every day taken off, hand held, sacrifice,
Gas pump, Late-to-bed followed by
Early-to-rise… every time I said something
Fear-based that was met with understanding.
Every little action that adds up to love
In action. I’m seeing it. I’m feeling it.
I’m trying to believe it and want it to stick
Around to see if it stays.
I don’t want to stray; I’m just scared of
What will happen in this city without
My influence. What will happen when
I’m in a position that requires faith?
My heart is thawing. I’m melting in
Wonder. I give myself over to the
Unknown. I give myself over and let go.